A-Accept Accept others for who they are and for the choices they've made even if you have difficulty understanding their beliefs, motives or actions.
B-Break Away Break away from everything that stands in the way of what you hope to accomplish with your life.
C-Create Create a family of friends whom you can share your hopes, dreams, sorrows and happiness with.
D-Decide Decide that you'll be successful and happy come what may, and good things will find you. The roadblocks are only minor obstacles along the way.
E-Explore Explore and experiment. The world has much to offer and you have much to give. And every time you try something new, you'll learn more about yourself.
F-Forgive Forgive and forget. Grudges only weigh you down and inspire unhappiness and grief. Soar about it and remember that everyone makes mistakes.
G-Grow Leave the childhood monsters behind. They can no longer hurt you or stand in your way.
H-Hope Hope for the best and never forget that anything is possible as long as you remain dedicated to the task.
I-Ignore Ignore the negative voice inside your head. Focus instead on your goals and remember your accomplishments. Your past success is only a small inkling of what the future holds.
J-Journey Journey to new worlds, new possibilities, by remaining open-minded. Try to learn something new every day and you'll grow.
K-Know Know that no matter how bad things seem, they'll always get better. The warmth of spring always follows the harshest winter.
L-Love Let love fill your heart instead of hate. When hate is in your heart, there's room for nothing else but when love is in your heart, there's room for endless happiness.
M-Manage Manage your time and your expenses wisely and you'll suffer less stress and worry. Then you'll be able to focus on the important things in life.
N-Notice Never ignore the poor, infirm, helpless, weak or suffering. Offer your assistance when possible, and always your kindness and understanding.
O-Open Open your eyes and take in all the beauty around you. Even during the worst of times, there's still much to be thankful for.
P-Play Never forget to have fun along the way. Success means nothing without happiness.
Q-Question Ask many questions because you are here to learn.
R-Relax Refuse to let worry and stress rule your life and remember that things always have a way of working out in the end.
S-Share Share your talent, skills, knowledge and time with others. Everything that you invest in others will return to you many times over.
T-Try Even when your dreams seem impossible to reach, try anyway. You'll be amazed by what you can accomplish.
U-Use Use your gifts to your best ability. Talent that's wasted has no value. Talent that's used will bring unexpected rewards.
V-Value Value the friends and family members who've supported you and encouraged you and be there for them as well.
W-Work Work hard every day to be the best person you can be but never feel guilty if you fall short of your goals. Every sunrise offers a new opportunity.
X-X-Ray Look deep inside the hearts of those around you and you'll see the goodness and beauty within.
Y-Yield Yield to commitment. If you stay on track and remain dedicated, you'll find success at the end of the road.
Z-Zoom Zoom to a happy place when bad memories or sorrow rears its ugly head. Let nothing interfere with your goals. Instead, focus on your abilities, your dreams and a brighter tomorrow.
I did not write this but borrowed from the publication, Fraternally Yours.
Monday, November 2, 2015
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
They Are Married!
This past Saturday was one of the happiest days of my life. Truly. My big sister got married. Not only did she get married, but I had the honor and privilege of conducting the ceremony. I have loved Cathy for 14 years and she's been a part of our family for 14 years and to be the one to make it "official" between the two of them was overwhelming. It was a perfect afternoon and evening. We cried and we laughed a lot. It was a wonderful celebration.
My sister is my best friend, my shoulder to cry on, someone I know I will always laugh with and someone I've always looked up to. She is one of the most loving and caring people I know. She's dedicated to her family, her friends and her church and in the past, her country as she's a veteran of the U.S. Air Force. Yet until June 26th, 2015, she was not allowed to marry the person she loves just because she is gay. It didn't matter that she was a hard working citizen who paid her taxes and helped those less fortunate. It didn't matter that she served her country for 8 years. It didn't matter that she served her church in so many different ways. She couldn't get married because she wanted to marry a woman. She loved a woman. That's it. Although she and her now wife had been together for 14 years in a loving, commitment relationship, they could not legally marry. Enough of the negative. I just want to focus on the positive.
One of my favorite parts of the ceremony:
My sister is my best friend, my shoulder to cry on, someone I know I will always laugh with and someone I've always looked up to. She is one of the most loving and caring people I know. She's dedicated to her family, her friends and her church and in the past, her country as she's a veteran of the U.S. Air Force. Yet until June 26th, 2015, she was not allowed to marry the person she loves just because she is gay. It didn't matter that she was a hard working citizen who paid her taxes and helped those less fortunate. It didn't matter that she served her country for 8 years. It didn't matter that she served her church in so many different ways. She couldn't get married because she wanted to marry a woman. She loved a woman. That's it. Although she and her now wife had been together for 14 years in a loving, commitment relationship, they could not legally marry. Enough of the negative. I just want to focus on the positive.
One of my favorite parts of the ceremony:
"We are gathered here today to celebrate the commitment that Cathy Anne Thum and Elizabeth Britt Blakeslee have made together. Their journey began 14 years ago. This day is not the beginning of their marriage, but is a celebration of the recognition of their union and a reaffirmation of their love for each other in the presence of their family-those here today and those that have gone before us."
I love that line. A celebration of the recognition of their union. A union that is finally recognized by the state and this country.
Love is love.
Monday, September 14, 2015
June 26, 2015
As I continue to reflect on the fact that my dad has been gone for 10 years, I have thought quite a bit about how thrilled my dad would have been on June 26th. This was the day that my sister, his daughter whom he loved deeply and accepted with no exceptions, was given the legal right to marry. He'd be even more excited to know that we are going to celebrate their 14 year commitment to one another on Oct. 3rd when they do indeed get married. I know Dad would have loved to have given Liz away just as he did me. He loved and adored Cathy and was so happy that Liz was happy.
I know he'd also get a kick out of the fact that I became ordained and that I'm going to perform the ceremony! I can't wait to be able to join the two of them in marriage. It's a shame that he will miss out of this very special day but I know he will be with us in spirit.
I know he'd also get a kick out of the fact that I became ordained and that I'm going to perform the ceremony! I can't wait to be able to join the two of them in marriage. It's a shame that he will miss out of this very special day but I know he will be with us in spirit.
Sunday, September 6, 2015
10 years
Ten years ago this morning, the first man I ever loved left this earth. My dad. I haven't hugged him, talked to him, heard his laugh or his voice in ten years. 10 years. It doesn't seem possible. I think of him daily and he's in my heart but I miss his physical presence so much. So much that it makes my heart ache sometimes. There are still times when something will happen and I will think, if only for a split second, oh, I need to call Dad and tell him this. It's weird how your mind works. He was my cheerleader, my shoulder to cry on and a living example of a true Christian. He had love in his heart for all people. He was also the smartest man I will ever know. He worked hard for his education and even harder to provide for his family.
September 5th, 2005. We had all been together out at the house in London on the 5th-it was Labor Day and we had gathered as a family to celebrate my nephew Sam's 16th birthday as well as our 6th anniversary. Dad had been diagnosed with ALS almost a year prior to this day and while he was deteriorating pretty rapidly, we had no idea the end was near. We had had a discussion with him about 3 days prior about his need for a catheter and getting a hospital bed in the house because physically, we just couldn't get him in and out of bed anymore. He wasn't happy about that but we really had no choice other than have him go to a nursing care facility and none of us wanted that. He wanted to be at home. He had started to have some respiratory issues (he used a BiPap machine) and trouble swallowing but he had made it clear in his medical directive that he did not want to be trached/vented nor did he want a feeding tube. Anyhow, we said our goodbyes on the 5th and I told him I loved him and that I'd see him tomorrow. I was going to pick Evan up from preschool and come out and help my mom with him that afternoon. Nothing out of the ordinary. I went to bed not knowing just how much my world would change the next morning.
September 6, 2005. The phone rang about 6:15 a.m. and Mike jumped out of bed to answer it. I got up as well and as he hung up the phone, he turned to me and said, he's gone. It took me a second to realize what he was talking about because, while ALS was ravaging his body, he was not near death. We were told we needed to get out there as soon as possible if we wanted to see him before the funeral home came. We got Evan up and told him and I think that was the hardest thing I've had to do yet. He adored my dad. He was 4 1/2 and getting ready that day to start his last year of preschool-that's why Sept. 6th was supposed to be a monumental day in our house that year, not the death of Grandpa.
When we arrived in London, I went into the living room where his body was. I felt a sense of comfort immediately when I looked at him because I knew Dad was in heaven. The body before me was just that. Dad's soul and spirit was elsewhere. I kissed his head and told him I loved him and that he was no longer suffering. It turned out to be a beautiful blue sky day, just as Dad would have loved.
We all gathered at the big dining room table where we all sat for quite awhile, alternating between laughter and tears. Cathy and Mike went out for Krispy Kreme doughnuts and Egg McMuffins-I will never forget that! People stopped by all day and new tears would start again along with more laughter. Food was brought, flowers were dropped off. It was overwhelming to see how much he meant to people not only in the church but in the town of London. It sounds kind of strange to actually say this out loud, but it was kind of a fun day, one I didn't want to end. Yes, we were emotionally and physically exhausted but the gathering of people at his home was something Dad loved. And gathered they did!
Now to today. I have been thinking a lot about these past 10 years. I don't feel as though much as changed in my life, although I hadn't been working at the hospital when he died. I like to think he'd be proud of the work I've done these past 8 years in the place where Evan's journey began. I've run a half marathon and I've gotten myself in pretty good shape but other than that, I've just gotten older (I'm 52-yikes!). What strikes me the most is how much his grandsons have changed in these past 10 years. Jack was 19, Sam 16 and Evan 4. A lot happens when you are young and 10 years go by. Jack is now happily married with an almost 4 month old baby boy who was named after my dad. Sam, as of last week, is now happily married as well. Both hard working, respectable young men. Sweet and caring too. Evan went from a small boy in preschool to a 5'9" high school freshman. So many milestones have been reached by these three and my dad was not there to witness them. That's when it hits me that he's really been gone 10 years.
ALS is a cruel and ugly disease. It was so hard to watch my dad's body fail him when his mind was still so sharp. That's what this disease does to people. We had decided to participate in our first Walk to Defeat ALS before he died and had hoped to walk in his honor but instead, three weeks after his death, walked in him memory. We have walked every year ever since. We will continue to walk until there is a cure.
To be continued.......
September 5th, 2005. We had all been together out at the house in London on the 5th-it was Labor Day and we had gathered as a family to celebrate my nephew Sam's 16th birthday as well as our 6th anniversary. Dad had been diagnosed with ALS almost a year prior to this day and while he was deteriorating pretty rapidly, we had no idea the end was near. We had had a discussion with him about 3 days prior about his need for a catheter and getting a hospital bed in the house because physically, we just couldn't get him in and out of bed anymore. He wasn't happy about that but we really had no choice other than have him go to a nursing care facility and none of us wanted that. He wanted to be at home. He had started to have some respiratory issues (he used a BiPap machine) and trouble swallowing but he had made it clear in his medical directive that he did not want to be trached/vented nor did he want a feeding tube. Anyhow, we said our goodbyes on the 5th and I told him I loved him and that I'd see him tomorrow. I was going to pick Evan up from preschool and come out and help my mom with him that afternoon. Nothing out of the ordinary. I went to bed not knowing just how much my world would change the next morning.
September 6, 2005. The phone rang about 6:15 a.m. and Mike jumped out of bed to answer it. I got up as well and as he hung up the phone, he turned to me and said, he's gone. It took me a second to realize what he was talking about because, while ALS was ravaging his body, he was not near death. We were told we needed to get out there as soon as possible if we wanted to see him before the funeral home came. We got Evan up and told him and I think that was the hardest thing I've had to do yet. He adored my dad. He was 4 1/2 and getting ready that day to start his last year of preschool-that's why Sept. 6th was supposed to be a monumental day in our house that year, not the death of Grandpa.
When we arrived in London, I went into the living room where his body was. I felt a sense of comfort immediately when I looked at him because I knew Dad was in heaven. The body before me was just that. Dad's soul and spirit was elsewhere. I kissed his head and told him I loved him and that he was no longer suffering. It turned out to be a beautiful blue sky day, just as Dad would have loved.
We all gathered at the big dining room table where we all sat for quite awhile, alternating between laughter and tears. Cathy and Mike went out for Krispy Kreme doughnuts and Egg McMuffins-I will never forget that! People stopped by all day and new tears would start again along with more laughter. Food was brought, flowers were dropped off. It was overwhelming to see how much he meant to people not only in the church but in the town of London. It sounds kind of strange to actually say this out loud, but it was kind of a fun day, one I didn't want to end. Yes, we were emotionally and physically exhausted but the gathering of people at his home was something Dad loved. And gathered they did!
Now to today. I have been thinking a lot about these past 10 years. I don't feel as though much as changed in my life, although I hadn't been working at the hospital when he died. I like to think he'd be proud of the work I've done these past 8 years in the place where Evan's journey began. I've run a half marathon and I've gotten myself in pretty good shape but other than that, I've just gotten older (I'm 52-yikes!). What strikes me the most is how much his grandsons have changed in these past 10 years. Jack was 19, Sam 16 and Evan 4. A lot happens when you are young and 10 years go by. Jack is now happily married with an almost 4 month old baby boy who was named after my dad. Sam, as of last week, is now happily married as well. Both hard working, respectable young men. Sweet and caring too. Evan went from a small boy in preschool to a 5'9" high school freshman. So many milestones have been reached by these three and my dad was not there to witness them. That's when it hits me that he's really been gone 10 years.
ALS is a cruel and ugly disease. It was so hard to watch my dad's body fail him when his mind was still so sharp. That's what this disease does to people. We had decided to participate in our first Walk to Defeat ALS before he died and had hoped to walk in his honor but instead, three weeks after his death, walked in him memory. We have walked every year ever since. We will continue to walk until there is a cure.
To be continued.......
 |
| His last day |
 |
| This is how I think of him |
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
My Shutterfly vacation photo book!
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Sunday, July 7, 2013
What happened to the first half of 2013???
Obviously I have not been very good at blogging this year and I'm not even going to try to play catch up. My poor 50 year old brain can't handle that. Yep. THAT happened. I turned 50. I'm trying to embrace it and remember that I'm 50 and fabulous. It's my mantra every day when I look in the mirror.
Soooo, I'll start with the most recent events in my life.
Last week I took a trip to our hometown of East Aurora NY with my mom, sister Liz and brother Jay. That's it. Just the 4 of us together. What a special weekend it was for all of us. Lots of laughs and some tears. Many memories. We were able to actually go inside our home at 305 Grover Rd which is the first house I remember. We were there from '63-'69. I started kindergarten at that house, learned how to ride my bike at that house and it was the beginning of many memories which included our extended family. We stopped to just look at the house and the owner was outside. She was thrilled that we were there and she invited us in. I'll tell you, tears immediately came to my eyes when I walked in and saw that the kitchen was exactly how I remember it to be. Took my breath away.
We also thought it would be fun to re-created the shopping cart incident. I don't need to say anything more.
We also visited our old elementary school.
Ahhh, such wonderful memories. We also celebrated my mom's 86th birthday while there. I give thanks every day that she is still here with us and that I was blessed with such an incredible mother. I admire her strength, her faith and the lives that she has touched. She has no idea how much she means to people. She is my rock.
So, here we are. Half of 2013 is over. My half year resolution is to get back to writing more. There. I said it and it's out there so it has to happen.
Soooo, I'll start with the most recent events in my life.
Last week I took a trip to our hometown of East Aurora NY with my mom, sister Liz and brother Jay. That's it. Just the 4 of us together. What a special weekend it was for all of us. Lots of laughs and some tears. Many memories. We were able to actually go inside our home at 305 Grover Rd which is the first house I remember. We were there from '63-'69. I started kindergarten at that house, learned how to ride my bike at that house and it was the beginning of many memories which included our extended family. We stopped to just look at the house and the owner was outside. She was thrilled that we were there and she invited us in. I'll tell you, tears immediately came to my eyes when I walked in and saw that the kitchen was exactly how I remember it to be. Took my breath away.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
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